The Classroom and The Baby's Room

02 May 2012

Since you've all been dying for more classroom/babyroom posts, I've finally decided to cave.

Yesterday my students turned in their final portfolios for the semester, so all that lies between me and almost four months of summer is a mountain of (my favorite!) grading. 

Ever since Jacob started working again I've been bringing Jake to my office hours. He chews on wires and binder clips, opens every drawer he can reach, takes off down the hallway whenever the door opens, and spreads the contents of his diaper bag everywhere. He only peed on the floor once (sorry Wendy...) When students visit I try to maintain some level of authority as he sucks on my face or pulls down my shirt.

Deceptive innocence

The classroom became the baby's room once when my babysitter bailed and I had to bring him into class strapped on my back. Jake fussed whenever he couldn't see the students, so I taught the entire class facing the side of the room.

Yesterday was full of goodbyes, lots of handshakes, and two hesitant hugs. 

One girl - my sweet little airhead - came in, handed me her work, and said: "Just the portfolio, right?" And I said yes and smiled, but I was thinking: "Yes, just ALL the written work you've done in the course." This is the same girl who once in a sentence accidentally wrote "internally" instead of  "eternally," and when I asked her which she meant, she replied: "Well..which one works better?"

That was one of the more memorable moments of my semester (riveting! I know!) until the following incident. 

One of my baseball players came in extra flustered at the cut off time for portfolio collection. He had been a decent and respectful student all semester, and he had thus almost redeemed college baseball players in my mind despite multiple negative experiences teaching them over the years. He handed in his portfolio and took a deep breath. Slightly concerned, I asked how finals week was going for him, and he said he was stressed out because his girlfriend was in surgery and he was hurrying so he could be there when she got out.  

I expressed an appropriate level of concern.

Then the 19 year old proceeded to plummet from all my good graces as he shrugged his shoulders and, with a bit of a smirk, said: "She's just getting her boobs done."

The awkwardness cannot be overstated really. I managed to raise my eyebrows only a little, keep my face-twitching to a minimum, and say something like "Ah-oh-uh." 

Then there was silence as we watched Jake rip paper. 

He told me how much he loved kids. 

I nodded.

Then I crossed my arms over my chest because I had started letting down...which always happens to my still-lactating-self whenever I get embarrassed.

15 comments :

  1. I will make a note to stop licking carpet in our office then...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh no - how awkward and hilarious!! Thanks for a great laugh this morning!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Hilarious!! I can totally picture this scene in my head. I love it!!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. ahahhahah! this is hilarious.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Perhaps you let down because your body was thankful to have boobs intact! Awesome story--so LA.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Here from Camp Patton.

    Oh. My God. Just awesome.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Well, not everyday you live that little treasure. Things that make you go Hmmmm...

    Angie @ http://hayshousemisadventures.blogspot.com/

    ReplyDelete
  8. OH. M. G. And that's all I can say about that!!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. I would like to thank you for the efforts you have made in writing this article. I am hoping the same best work from you in the future as well.. 
    http://www.alsurtravel.com |

    ReplyDelete
  10. I¡¦ll right away grab your rss as I can not in finding your email subscription link or newsletter service. Do you have any? Please let me understand so that I may subscribe. Thanks.
    zesttravel |

    ReplyDelete
  11. Howdy! Quick question that’s entirely off topic. Do you know how to make your site mobile friendly? My blog looks weird when browsing from my iphone. I’m trying to find a theme or plugin that might be able to resolve this issue. If you have any recommendations, please share. Cheers!
    greencostaricahomes.com |

    ReplyDelete
  12. Pretty portion of content. I just stumbled upon your weblog and in accession capital to assert that I acquire in fact enjoyed account your weblog posts. Any way I will be subscribing on your augment or even I achievement you get admission to constantly quickly.
    anyonecanbe.co.uk |

    ReplyDelete
  13. All i have to tell is to congratulate you hugely for bringing up this complex issue to public discussion and controlling it so exceptionally well. Good work worthy at least one more return to your blog!
    resourcesworkforce.com |

    ReplyDelete
  14. Fast shipping. Very smooth and easy transaction. Thank you.
    http://www.nywedding4u.com |

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...